class=”alignleft size-thumbnail wp-image-22622″ style=”margin: 10px;” title=”Twilight Eclipse IMAX Poster” src=”https://www.heyuguys.com/images/2010/05/Twilight-Eclipse-IMAX-Poster-220×150.jpg” alt=”” width=”220″ height=”150″ />I’m sure I don’t need to remind anyone, but the third installment of the Twilight Saga will be hitting theaters in just a few short weeks.  Now, upon hearing this news you will do one of two things: 1) squeal with delight saying “OHMYGODOHMYGODOHMYGOD” or 2) let out a deep meaningful sign accompanied by a huge exaggerated eye roll that will most likely cause permanent retinal damage.  Either way, the fact remains that the film will be released and it’s going to make a boat load of cash.

I will admit, maybe a bit shamefully that I was at one time on the Twilight bandwagon. I read all four books back to back in a matter of days.  Well, consumed them would be a better description.  I had the first one finished before I saw the first movie and it continued on from there.  I did however draw the line at the films and the books.  I don’t own an Edward life size stand up or anything like that. Seriously, I don’t.

When I started to read the books, I was pretty engrossed, much to the chagrin of my roommates.  But I charged ahead, like an addict looking for that next fix.  About a year after finishing all 4 books, and seeing the first film, I went back to re-read them again before the second film came out.  I know.  You don’t have to say it.  I really don’t know what I was thinking.  As I read through them a second time, I realized that I was reading them in a completely different mindset.  Instead of reading them with stars in my eyes and songs of unrequited love in my heart, my inner sarcastic cynic came out with a vengeance.  Needless to say the romantic was thrown a beating from the cynic. It was a rumble in the jungle and the cynic won.

The second time around was more painful than anything else. Instead of fawning over Edward or Jacob, I really just wanted to reach into the books and slap Bella.  For some reason I guess I didn’t notice on the first time around just how much she talks about how beautiful Edward is.  Ok! I get it! He’s so beautiful it hurts blah blah blah. It’s enough to make a girl pull out her hair or at the very least end up with a mild case of depression.

I went to see New Moon and while I wasn’t as enamored with it as the first one, I still enjoyed it for what it was.  There was a time where after the first one was released that there was no question I would go see every segment in the theater as soon as I could get there.  I just don’t feel the same now.  Perhaps the second read through was the culprit.  Perhaps my vision had cleared and I was no longer dazzled by Edward and his sparkly skin (which, by the way, I ALWAYS found to be utterly ridiculous).

My obsession has since turned to indifference in that I won’t break my neck in order to get to the theater.  If I see it, I see it, if I don’t, I saved $8.  But listen here Stephanie Meyer….I’m on to you.  This new book you released about an inconsequential character from Eclipse is just silly.  If a prequel is in the works at any time, my head is going to explode like that scene from Scanners.

I look back on my relationship with the Twilight Saga and I just have to shake my head.  It’s a lot like 80’s fashion.  Sure, you wore those head bands, the side pony, the legwarmers, jelly shoes and black rubber bracelets, but that doesn’t mean you need to your friends to post those pictures on Facebook as a reminder.

I guess what it really boils down to is this: I don’t think I was ever a great fit for it.  For me it was a phase.  A fleeting urge to ride that pop culture phenomenon .  I don’t begrudge those who love it however.  Go have your Twilight parties and midnight screenings.  I have a 12 year old in my house who would totally do all of those things if she could.  Of course I’ll take her to see Eclipse as well as Breaking Dawn.  But I don’t foresee myself reading the saga for a 3rd time.  Twice was enough and I don’t have enough patience to get through them again.  So go forth you crazy Twi-hards!  I’ll be sitting here patiently waiting for the release of the next film in a franchise that will never get old.  Bring on the next Harry Potter!

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Tracy Ladd
Tracy started writing movie reviews for her high school newspaper way back in the ancient times of the late 80's. She joined forces with HeyUGuys in May 2009 and still continues to unleash her arsenal of sarcasm on the masses while working movie quotes into every conversation she has. She doesn't mind when someone looks at her weird when she yells "GAME OVER MAN!". You can find her here on HeyUGuys, or over on ReelGoddess.com