Mockbuster kings The Asylum are currently basking in the slightly disingenuous ray of glory following Syfy’s premiere of Sharknado. The film was instantly picked up by bored celebrities on Twitter and started to ‘trend’ across the world, giving many people their first glimpse at the work of The Asylum.

Not ones to miss their celebrity-propelled moment articles in THR and Variety followed and the Burbank studio was suddenly under a playful, if as I said – slightly snarky, spotlight. A sequel was rushed into production (Shark TOO-nami is my pick for the name) and it is fair to say that this is perhaps the studio’s golden hour.

While the stream of rip-offs (Atlantic Rim?) and low-budget, ultra-gory, mega-ridiculous features will continue The Asylum may never reach the heights scaled with Sharknado, yet they are here to stay and we decided to mock the mockers and create our own posters for other dream projects which The Asylum could have gone for.

Here then are our 2013 Blockbusters which could have been, and may be yet to come…

 

 

Betamax

Cecil-Freeman

Cold

Doom-Gentlemen-Please

Doris

Fergie

Gods-with-Hammers

Oriental-Clawhound

President-Evil

The-Gremlin

Up-Poppins-Chimney

Woz

Z.O.M.F.G