Like a greased supine otter on a near-vertical water slide the latest Pirates of the Caribbean film is approaching us with gathering speed. Now is not the time to question the validity of a fifth film based on a theme park ride, nor to infer that, apart from a spirited opening film, the whole POTC enterprise has been one dealing in ever-increasing mediocrity. Our oars are out for this new film. Early word is that it’s pretty good, as it should be with the collective talent it holds.

Your man Johnny Depp reunites with Orlando Bloom, Geoffrey Rush and Kevin McNally along with Stephen Graham, Martin Klebba, Brenton Thwaites, David Wenham, Kaya Scodelario, Golshifteh Farahani and even Paul McCartney. I’m now actually looking forward to a sixth film with Ringo Starr as captain of a primitive submersible, maybe yellow in colour.

Anyway the reason I’m here writing this, and that you’re there reading this is that Disney have released some fine new poster, featuring the main characters in this new film. Cast your eyes down and take them all in why don’t you?

The film hoves into view around May 2017. Here are the posters you’ll see adorning the bus shelters of modern Britain.

Pirates of the Caribbean 5 Character Posters

Pirates of the Caribbean 5 Character Poster

Pirates of the Caribbean 5 Character Poster Pirates of the Caribbean 5 Character Poster Pirates of the Caribbean 5 Character Poster Pirates of the Caribbean 5 Character Poster

A really bad Pirates of the Caribbean 5 Movie Poster

Pirates of the Caribbean Movie Poster
Yikes.

A (much better) Pirates of the Caribbean 5 Movie Poster

Pirates of the Caribbean 5 Movie Poster

Pirates of the Caribbean Dead Men Tell No Tales Trailer

Synopsis

Captain Jack Sparrow finds the winds of ill-fortune blowing even more strongly when deadly ghost pirates led by his old nemesis, the terrifying Captain Salazar, escape from the Devil’s Triangle, determined to kill every pirate at sea…including him. Captain Jack’s only hope of survival lies in seeking out the legendary Trident of Poseidon, a powerful artifact that bestows upon its possessor total control over the seas.